


deadlines

by sunshinefleur



Series: unnecessarily angsty drabbles [1]
Category: NCT (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Gen, Implied/Referenced Character Death, Implied/Referenced Suicide, Mentions of alcohol, PLS READ THE TAGS/WARNINGS, References to Depression, References to Drugs
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-28
Updated: 2020-10-28
Packaged: 2021-03-08 19:02:16
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 438
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27241618
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sunshinefleur/pseuds/sunshinefleur
Summary: once you've lived one day, you've lived them all.
Series: unnecessarily angsty drabbles [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2057484
Comments: 4
Kudos: 10





	deadlines

**Author's Note:**

> PLEASE MAKE SURE YOU'VE READ THE TAGS/WARNINGS BEFORE YOU READ THIS STORY. it's short but dark, pls keep yourself safe <3

mark was slipping. he could feel it. he could feel the time passing through his hands like grains of sand with every day that went by. he didn’t know where the time was going, only that it was. projects, assignments, deadlines. dead. 

“morning sleepyhead,” a hand ruffling his hair. “you’ve been sleeping for  _ ages _ , come grab lunch with me?” he pasted on a smile and swung his leaden legs out of bed. 

“sure, sounds like fun! where do you wanna go?”

“our usual?”

their usual. the same routine, over. and over. and over again. 

a smile. “perfect.”  _ i need to feel. _

\-----------------------------------------

another day, another class, another hour spent in front of a laptop. 

“mark, what’d you get for number 14?” what did he get? he couldn’t remember.

“i… i’m sorry, i didn’t get that far.” 

“mark, you need to keep up. alright, we’ll come back to you. who’s next?”

turning the camera off. a tear, tracing a path down his cheek. he just wanted to sleep.  _ please, let me sleep.  _

\-----------------------------------------

“i’m concerned about your grade, you’re really not doing well in this class. what’s going on?”

“i’m just dealing with some personal stuff right now, it’s not a huge deal. i’ll get back on track soon, i’m so sorry.”

“how about i help you come up with a plan so you’ll at least pass for the semester?”

“no, it’s alright! i’m okay, really.”

visible doubt. “alright, but let me know if you need anything. i’ll exempt you from this week’s assignment, but make sure you start turning things in on time.”

“i can do that, thank you so much!” undeserved kindness.  _ i don’t belong here _ .

\-----------------------------------------

wake up. eat. go to class. eat. go to class. eat. work. sleep. wake up. eat. go to class. eat. go to class. eat. work. sleep. wake up. eat. go to class. eat. go to class. eat. work. sleep. wake up. eat. go to class. eat. go to class. eat. work. sleep. 

monotony.  _ get me out of here.  _

\-----------------------------------------

“there’s a party happening this weekend, we  _ have  _ to go.”

“do we?”

“ _ yes.  _ you haven’t left this building in weeks. i’m getting you out if it kills me.”

_ it’ll kill one of us. not you. _

\-----------------------------------------

shot after shot after shot after shot after shot after shot. 

“hey mark, slow down. the party’s not going anywhere.”

“but i am. bye guys, i’ll see you around.” a decision made.

a cold walk home. unlocking the door. collapsing on the couch. a deep breath.

standing up. stumbling into the bathroom. 

opening the bottle. pouring them out. everything in him, all at once. 

closed eyes. a smile. 

_ finally. sleep. _

**Author's Note:**

> thanks for reading this little vent fic, feel free to scream at me if it made you sad


End file.
